Rebeccus Farcis

Rebeccus Farcis means "Have Fun", in err.. the yet to be discovered Martian.

The Wedding Season

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Meteorological trends of a typical Indian year could be classified as thus: Summer season, and depending on where you are and if you are lucky enough, monsoon and winter seasons. There exists no spring, we’ve cut down all trees to see any more of it. Sandwiched between them lies what we often-hate-mostly-love-but-just-can’t-ignore wedding season.

There are different types of weddings.

1. The most convenient of weddings is the one that pops up on your Facebook wall: “XYZ is now married to ABC”. You say “Congrats, wish you both a happy married life”, click on “Unfollow Post” and conveniently forget it. One fine day you meet the same person at a cinema, spouse in tow, get that shock of life and exclaim, “Eh? You married? Never knew man!”.
2. They would’ve casually dropped a BCC note on your mail. You would attend that wedding if you were in town. Alas, you stay 800km away. No!
3. They would have dropped a note on your inbox. You ignored. They took the pains to go around the world to find you. They would have called your mom, your grandmom, your friend, your girlfriend, your former girlfriend, your pet dog, your pet baby python; all to find your current contact and address, just to invite you to their wedding. As it happens, its your appraisal season and you wouldn’t move out of office, night or day.
4. The close friends. You book your tickets 3 months in advance. You inform your manager even earlier, lest she reject your leave application.
5. Your family wedding. Tables turned, you go inviting people and pray that a few of them turn up.
6. The sixth type: Your own. Wedding. The author, at the time of writing hasn’t experienced this, nor has any intentions of experiencing this in the near future. Hence, in the interest of greater global good and world peace, we ignore this part.

Having classified them, I must tell you I’m no great a fan of weddings. Why?
1. I’ve never been able to dress appropriately for any wedding. Or, for that matter, anywhere else, but that’s a different case.
2. You aren’t allowed to go home without having posed for a snap with the groom and the bride. So you stand there not knowing whether to smile or not. If yes, whether to bare your teeth or not. Again, if bare your teeth, by how much. And while you are looking into the skies trying to determine the best pose, that photographer would have snapped you twice already and not exactly politely asked you to make way for that elderly couple next in line, struggling to carry their really huge present.
3. Presents. While we’re at it, how does one determine what you are supposed to gift the couple? Not carrying one is way too SheldonCooper-ian and socially frowned upon. Flower bouquets I thought were the safest option. But this last wedding I attended, the whole darned town had no bouquet. Just miles and miles of jasmine flowers. I’m told you can’t gift a real long garland of jasmine. That’s reserved for the bride and the groom, to gift each other.
4. Feasting. For someone with the build and diet of a Passeridae sparrow, feasting brings no cheer. And everyone in these weddings who intends to make you big and fat overnight, only look so demon-ish.

Hate it or like it, this is the season. Every day you see at least one of your buddies drop from the not-exactly-sworn fraternity of bachelorhood. And attending these weddings, is so much more fun, because you get to meet them. Its the company, silly.

P.S. Ok, 12000km away, one bright sunny Sunday morning, why does my dazed mind bring such thoughts up? Rajat marries the next weekend, and unfortunately I’m missing it. Thus crash my grand plans of visiting Delhi, thus crash my plans of meeting the good old folks, thus crash my plans of seeing a true big fat Delhi wedding.

P.P.S. Vishnu gets married the following weekend. And I’m invited. 🙂

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Written by Srinivas

May 7, 2013 at 12:33 am

Posted in Uncategorized

One Response

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  1. ahaa.. wedding season.. says it all….there were those days as kids, when i used to love going to receptions(in bhilai, only receptions were held for friends n colleagues) ..wedding used to take place in native followed by reception here.. and it used to be fun, meeting all friends but nowadays! yea its tough…

    Lets wait till your wedding and then recheck the pointers 😛

    Oh and call the pet dog.. seriously man!!! 😆

    P.S – this weekend is jagan’s wedding 😛 😛

    P.P.S – and its so good to see your blog post alert!!!

    Soundarya

    May 7, 2013 at 2:26 am


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